Bringing Forester

Writers write the things that they don't know how to say. They hide what they really feel behind beautiful words; may it be a poem a song, a prose or a play. I am a fan of words. Sometimes they haunt me, making me shut the door and just be at a corner finding the guts to face them. Day by day, a huge sign keeps flashing through my built-in screen of thoughts: I AM BOUND BY RULES. Words, for it to fly like a flock of doves from afar, should be stitched with these rules. Rules that I sometimes forget, being an overwhelmed fan that I am. I remember watching Finding Forester one boring morning and have this line from the lead character stuck in my head...

Don't think. Just write.

Those four words were rockstars for a long while. Letting your thoughts flow through a pen is a natural high that I forgot that everything in this world is bound by rules.

Even love.

Now I am loosing coherence, which is a cardinal rule for writers. Having these overwhelming ideas will make my head burst. It's like a gallon of water that wanted wanting to squeeze out from a piece of raisin. Jumping from one idea to another without a certain "bridge" would make my readers lost. As lost as I am on what it is that I wanted to write. Of what it is that I really wanted. Wanting a lot of things and having the thought that you cannot have even a single one leads me to not to want anything anymore. It's like me walking lazily to the path where the man I love normally walks, carrying that grain of hope that I would bump into him, which I have been doing for more than 67 days. It's insane, I know. But that's one way that I have thought of to deal with it. And writing about it is another thing.

Rules has to come out naturally. In my writing, that is. I guess I have to forget those four words, and have to have more words, paired with the rules, as rockstars. Wish me luck...